Welcome to Cal. GO BEARS!
“Go BEARS!” Cal fans shout in unison, tens of thousands strong, all wearing the same colors, all hailing the same icon. But did you know that the Golden Bear has been extinct in these parts for more than eight decades, killed off by Europeans - just like most of the indigenous Ohlone people (see pg. XX)? How does it feel to worship a statue?
Sorry to interrupt the Beer and Circus with a glass of cold water in the face. But that’s what this guide is: a subtle but intoxicating dose of pure, unadulterated, straight up… reality. Just like clean water (pg. XX).
Allow us to introduce ourselves. We are students, just like you (well, mostly just like you), who’ve been around the activist block a few times. We all love Cal. Errr, more like, we love the vision of what Cal could be.
Many of us were members of the Phoenix Coalition to Free the UC (pg. XX), a group that set out to transform the University into one which appreciates life in all of its diverse forms; that is governed in a democratic manner; that works and educates for peace and sustainability; that is ethical in all its relationships and endeavors.
Unfortunately, UC Berkeley is far from such a school as of now. UC has overseen the development of the world’s most deadly arsenal of weapons of mass destruction (pg. XX). UC’s Regents have profited from war (pg. XX). Cal recently sold itself lock, stock, and barrel to one of the most environmentally destructive corporations in the world (pg. XX). In fact, Gray Brechin eloquently reveals in Imperial San Francisco that UC is (and always has been) an imperial University.
But, there’s good news: students are standing up! This year’s dis guide highlights past struggles such as the Free Speech Movement (pg. XX), as well as ongoing campaigns such as resistance to military recruiters (pg. XX), action for labor justice (pg. XX), and the famous Oak Grove tree-sit (pg. XX).
When she’s not busy being an activist, a student’s gotta have fun, take care of herself, and grow as a person, right? Check out our tips on sexual juiciness (pg. XX), fun and free things to do in the Berkeley area (pg. XX), and opportunities with the Students’ Organic Garden (pg. XX).
By the way – for those of you who are still hearing “GO BEARS!” reverberate through your consciousness, we’ve got a report on Spirit at Cal (pg. XX) that might set you on the path to enlightenment… er, of course we meant to say the Rose Bowl.
Welcome to the revolution. Have fun. Kick Stanfurd’s ass.
Err, on second thought: why not launch a nonviolent campaign (pg. XX) to democratize the UC (pg. XX)!
Now that's something that would make me say, with all sincerity: GO BEARS!!!!!
Love,
Oski
P.S. – We ran out of pages and $$$. Check out www.caldisorientation.org for waaaaaay more great stuff than we could fit in print. It’s a wiki, post or edit a disorienting story yourself!
P.P.S. – Wanna produce a 2009 edition? Cool. Visit www.caldisorientation.org and… make it happen!